Aanchal MahajanCommitment Big word isn’t it? If you say you’re in a committed relationship, what does that mean? What are you actually committing to? ‘Jo waada kiya wo nibhana padega..?’
“I’m not in this world to live up to your expectations and you’re not in this world to live up to mine.” ~Bruce Lee
Stop expecting other people to act exactly as you would like them to, instead prefer being open to reactions from others.
One reason why so many relationships involve cheating, hatred, arguments and failure altogether are because commitments are poorly defined. Be specific, What are your expectations from each other? What have you decided to co-create together? Is your definition of love is simply a matter of texting “I love you Babe!” fifty times a day?
Defining Commitment
Being committed is not just a noun if you ask me, it’s a habit. It’s something that transforms a promise into reality by stretching your capabilities. We all have that one friend or relative whom we feel is really committed to exercising daily or the one who knows his goals and regularly working on it, without fail. How does it come from? It is something all of us can do. I feel if one truly loves something, badly wants to get it and strives towards it; irrespective of the results one is truly committed towards it.
We have all heard of our friends who say ” I am committed”, it is something not casual, it brings responsibilities to be with your loved ones in their thicks and thins. That is something really tough, life makes its own plans and we have to accept it . We see many people breaking or leaving their loved ones because some misfortune strikes them. Ask this to yourself before parting ‘only’ because of this reason. What is that thing we are so proud of? Money? Our good health? Our better looks? The answer is we are proud of our good fortune because it did not happen to us. I would interrupt saying, by frowning over your loved ones how wonderful it would be to become a part of his pain.
Be with someone who loves you unconditionally, appreciates you for all your best qualities, and would never judge you or leave you at your bad times.
It is not something pleasant and also not at facile but if we chose to stay away that is something inhuman. Helping out someone, being together in someone’s pain would give you another level of contentment which catching up with happy friends, watching movie would not. I am sure we would choose a difficult step instead of choosing an easy one to stay away because we are here to help others and not perform the act of being selfish.
The commitment would not mean that you devote your entire time to your beloved, it means you never forget to spare time for them from your busy schedule. Getting flowers, singing, playing music or even few minutes of one to one talks and spending time would make them feel they are valued. Listening to them when they really feel like opening up is more than enough. Certainly we all can and must do that. Listen to people when in need, that is all they want. Value everyone because who knows life would turn bitter to you, how would it feel to die alone? I do not want to die not having my loved one besides me shedding a tear for me. Show that you care and it would come back to you. Quite possible that the person you showed your commitment or took care of would not be able to retaliate, do not loose heart because doing good would always bring back good in some or the other form maybe not today, surely tomorrow.
Taking care or commitment are big words but can be done with small, continuous deeds. Even a smile serves the purpose, smile at people and shows them how you hide sorrows and spread joy.
Once a teacher in my class asked “Will you stay back with your fiance’ if he is paralyzed for life? To my delight, most of the class said ‘yes’. We all unanimously said “Ma’am that is the commitment after all”
Commitment requires free choice, not an obligation. Look beyond definitions, you will see something special, someone worth loving and caring for. Someone beautiful.
You and the love you share !